so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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