I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
