go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I look better un-naked...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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