butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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