just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
