No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
