Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
