Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
