I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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