She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
