you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
