I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I lost the right to judge tonight
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
