I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
