fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
