See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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