Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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