I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I need a beard to bite.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
