Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
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