I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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