oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
