I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
