Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
