No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize