Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize
