dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
