Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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