I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
