watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
the room spins SO much faster in panama
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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