Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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