the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
