i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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