Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He shit in the fireplace
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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