I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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