told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Randomize
