How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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