id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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