If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
