Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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