I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
should my penis look like a turkey
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
