You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
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