Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
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