Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
