Did you just see the Batmobile???
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
