"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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