peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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