Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
