you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
