Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
