I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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