I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
